a feel good

Recently, in large French city, a poster featuring a young, thin and tanned woman appeared in the window of a gym. It said:

THIS SUMMER DO YOU WANT TO BE A MERMAID OR A WHALE?

A middle aged woman, whose physical characteristics did not match those of the woman on the poster, responded publicly to the question posed by the gym.

To Whom It May Concern:

Whales are always surrounded by friends (dolphins, sea lions, curious humans). They have an active sex life, they get pregnant and have adorable baby whales. They have a wonderful time with dolphins stuffing themselves with shrimp. They play and swim in the seas, seeing wonderful places like Patagonia, the Barren Sea and the coral reefs of Polynesia. Whales are wonderful singers and have even recorded CDs. They are incredible creatures and virtually have no predators other than humans. They are loved, protected and admired by almost everyone in the world.

Mermaids don't exist. If they did exist, they would be lining up outside the offices of Argentinean psychoanalysts due to identity crisis. Fish or human? They don't have a sex life because they kill men who get close to them not to mention how could they have sex? Therefore they don't have kids either. Not to mention who wants to get close to a girl who smells like a fish store?

The choice is perfectly clear to me;
I want to be a whale.

Bologna or baloney

-I'm back from a great vacation full of fantastic family and food in Utah and have decided to never again leave this home with a man in charge of it.

{Shambles}

Remind me that word when I think of an excuse to go again please.

-Paul set up a bank account at a local bank and got a free Snuggie. Those things are static magnets. Ill stick with a regular quilt please.

-My lips. My burning lips. My dry, cracked burning lips. Nothing can cure them.

-I still hate the weather here.

-If you were me, would you paint a bathroom blue? Light blue? With white trim and cabinets?

-I need to potty train Maya. And kill the binky.

-Juicy Fruit gum will always be my favorite.

-Ive been faithfully wearing my Reebok Easytones and haven't lost a pound. Its a bunch of baloney. But they are comfy.

-Oh wait, am I not supposed to eat bologna while wearing them?

-And why cant bologna be spelled like baloney anyhow?

- Oh wait, it can be, just Googled it.

-Anyone want 2 huge boxes of kid toys? I'm sick of them.

-The reason why Paul set up an account at this particular local bank is because he is putting me on a budget. What!

-I really want to go to the British Isles.

-But Ill just settle for bed.

favorite home

We have a real life doll house up the street from where I grew up. In fact, this particular doll house is my grandmother dearests home. The home my dad grew up in, the home I would run through the fields to snag the fresh bread from, the most beautiful home on the block.

I speak for all 24 grand kids when I say, Grandma Wanda's home is the greatest home in the world. (minus the creepy basement)

A light bedroom complete with a brass bed and off white furniture, I love.

Upstairs is like a child's dream. One big bedroom and bathroom hooked onto a light sun room to go wild in.

One time in High School some friends and I made our little sisters cook dinner and we and our dates ate fettuccine Alfredo by candle light in the sun room... oh me-oh my-oh man.

A favorite Sunday activity-head up the street, eat chocolates and gossip with Grams.

One of the {very many} things I admire about my grandma is that there is no clutter. She keeps it very organized and clean. {and pays good money to the grand kids to do it :)}

A spiral staircase! Kid magnet.

89 years young she is. The most beautiful lady in the most beautiful house.

Love you Grandma.

and then

Paul and I took a little vacation from our vacation to fabulous[insert finger in mouth with tongue out sign] Las Vegas. Where we stayed at the Trump Hotel. Smoking and slot machines were no where in sight and the air smelled of lilacs. Even the shampoo was lilac scented. I highly recommend if you want to treat yourself. We shopped for these , we ate here (thank you Morgan :), and enjoyed sipping our sodas in the whirlpool tub.

Coming home from Vegas we drove straight to the beautiful red rocks of Southern Utah where we were reunited with our wild hair children to say
"cheese"

These particular rocks of Southern Utah are perfect for climbing on...

Or falling off of. The pink puffy coat was cause for some off balance. Sorry darlin.

My sister Julie is about to welcome Baby T. to the world. In his honor, we stuffed ourselves silly with delicious soup, bread sticks and cheesecakes-stocked her baby room with all the necessities and once again re-affirmed my yearning for wanting to have a babe in a Utah hospital.
(y'all have it made here)

But when baby party ended, the real party got started....

You want to party too? Turn on a work out video and go wild. Grumpy children in diapers only add to the effect.

So why in the world did we spend money on Christmas presents when this lone pair of reading glasses keeps em entertained and fighting for hours...

And for the adults? Whats been keeping us entertained?...besides awesome vocals of Heart breaker on Rock Band, late night movies, and constant movement to and from In n Out
....these....

BB guns off the back deck and empty pop cans in the trees. In my next life I should be a sniper in in the Green Berets. I'm absolutely that good.

Its been in the high 50s here. There is sunshine. Warm air. Bees buzzing.
Nothing like what is waiting for me when I hop on that airplane back to the frigid state they call Nebraska. Good thing Ive extended my vacation--- but did you expect any less from me? ;)

Morning Glory

Heres the story:

We got stuck in a major blizzard in Omaha Christmas Day. Too many delayed and canceled flight left us Christmas Roast Beastless.

To pass the time we spent numerous hours on the mac watching UP, chipmunks on youtube (watch that and tell me you dont laugh) and A Christmas Story on TBS all day long.

(Im most definitely aware of my cheeto cheeks)

Our meals were courtesy of the only BP in the whole Omaha metro area brave enough to be open and the vending machines down the hall.

By the grace of the hotel gods, we had unknowingly booked the Holiday Inn with the sweet water park and saved the day by throwing in the swim suits last second.

2 days and one super beast of a father later- we finally made it to Nana's, where Mayas bum took its rightful place.

More to come....